Caller ID: Utah, 1-385-313-3975

snarp:

Me: Hello?

Guy: Hello. This call is in regards to… a computer. Okay?

Me: …okay, then.

Guy: This is a call about a computer. Am I right in thinking that you are the main person in charge of this computer?

Me: You’re going to have to tell me which computer this is.

Guy: The “Windows” computer. The computer that runs the “Windows” operating system.

Me: I’m afraid we’ve got quite a few of those around here! You’ll need to be more specific.

Guy: Well. I am calling to tell you that this “Windows” computer has downloaded a virus, bad software, that is damaging your computer. And that you need to get it off there.

Me: *waiting in silence*

Guy: Ma’am? Ma’am? Can we help you fix your -

Me: I am an IT person, and this is a law office. Please do not try to scam the law office IT person. It’s not smart.

Guy: *laughs* Okay, then. Sorry, ma’am.

-

"Sorry I wasted your time with my con, I’ll just call someone else! You have a great day, now."

People pulling this scam are calling so frequently that I can now recognize it within three words. I say, “Stop calling this number, I’m an IT consultant, I’m not going to fall for this.” They continue calling. I can only assume that the people doing the actual calls are scamming their scammer bosses by declining to remove numbers from their database.

is this homestuck

The Game of Life and Death and Other Stuff and Breaking The Fourth Wall

Lengthy, meandering dream about some kind of Fruits Basket/Sandman/Homestuck/(Fate/Zero) crossoverish thing, in which the anthropomorphic representations of certain principles are born into a specific family and forced to do battle and solve puzzles as part of a potentially-universe-destroying game. It was presented as a TV show that had just concluded its second season.

The main characters were Life, Death, Curiosity, Rationality, and Rationality’s human best friend, who was the heroine/hook character. The phases of the game can only be initialized and ended by a normal human unrelated to the Universe Family, and this girl was chosen near the beginning of the series, after the previous human died in mysterious circumstances, temporarily putting the game on hold.

(Breaking The Fourth Wall was a principle apparently in need of representation in this narrative; that guy went around in superhero costumes, like Ultraman and Wonder Woman, and made fun of the other characters directly to the audience. He was never shown solving any puzzles or fighting, and Life and Death were the only characters who acknowledged his existence.)

Life was the most “normal” of the family, an overweight, neurotic guy in his early twenties who wanted to be a stand-up comic, but was too self-conscious. Death was a woman a year or two younger than Life and in grad school in some demanding STEM field (not medicine); she had intense performance anxiety in the “real” world, but didn’t care much about the game, which she engaged in only reluctantly.

Death and Life were siblings, and were best friends (they wore matching goth outfits) and very protective of each other. They were largely ineffective at keeping each other safe, however, as both were completely unwilling to hurt another person - even their family members, whom they knew would be healed completely of their injuries after each round of the game concluded. Unless they were being assisted by another family member, they were painfully killed in every round of the game.

Death and Life were targeted mainly by Chaos and Deceit, as most of the rest of the family considered it unsporting to hurt the pacifists. In the summer when school was out for the kids, however, they were protected by Rationality, who was in middle school, occasionally assisted by Curiosity, who was in high school.

Read More

Hamstek Book Club - what would the reading list be?

The Dream-Quest of Unknown Kadath and A Night in the Lonesome October seem obvious. I guess you could argue the Amber books instead of the latter, but ANLO contains roughly half of Homestuck’s plot elements boiled down to under 300 pages.

Young Wizards series? Yeah, it has a shitton of thematic similarities, let’s put Young Wizards on there.

Someone give me some SF for this. I can’t plausibly recommend Cyteen even though I obviously want to, those parallels are only there if you habitually squint as hard as I do at both works.

Some dudes found those posts about the man rings by browsing the “manly” tag. I am DONE with this website. Here’s one more man ring before I go.

The Opinion About dril of J. Alfred Prufrock

I’m sorry that I have not been pretending to be an official sort of moon base on Twitter recently. In my defense I am basically in hibernation at this point.

I think that’s what depression actually is. We caught hibernation from a bear. Goddamn bears, why can’t you observe ordinary sanitary procedures.

snarp:

Most of the contents of this blog do appear to be intended seriously.

People please do not reblog this goddamn post from me and tag it as “inspirational.” My mental state is fragile.

snarp:

Most of the contents of this blog do appear to be intended seriously.

People please do not reblog this goddamn post from me and tag it as “inspirational.” My mental state is fragile.

How am I supposed to be an asshole on eBay if my sniping program keeps crashing.

forkflinger replied to your post: Men’s wedding rings are kind of fucked…

psst: wimp.com/remover…

I feel reasonably certain that if that were always an option, ring-cutting tools would not be a standard thing for emergency services personnel to carry around, and no one would have had to do these three studies.

Apparently, the simplest way to get tungsten carbide rings off is to clamp pliers down on them really hard until they shatter, because they’re brittle. (That does send little shards of stuff flying everywhere, though.) I can’t see the studies themselves, so I’m not clear if that works with the ones that are also banded with titanium or steel - maybe you could use a standard cutter on those once the tungsten carbide’s broken up.

One of them’s a case study where someone used a dental drill, which got the ring off without entirely destroying it, but I don’t think EMTs have those.

Important Query

thegeekgene:

I was trying to take a nap earlier and was PREVENTED FROM DOING SO by a SERIOUS QUESTION which I will now SHARE WITH THE INTERNETZ.

What blood color would Sakura Oogami have, if she were a Homestuck troll? Would she be a highblood, one who actually understands nobility, the kind of troll Equius wishes he were? Or would she be a lowblood who fought her way to success despite low expectations and adversity at every turn? I called snarp about this important issue and she said her interest in/awareness of her ancestors leaned highblood. Forkflinger concurred. I’m still on the fence, because the gender issues she seems to struggle with wouldn’t be so much of a factor in her troll life, considering what we know about Alternia, and I think a lowblood with a preoccupation with more stereotypically highblood concerns might make an effective parallel. Forkflinger is ignoring me in favor of making a ren faire outfit (in which she will undoubtably look lovely) and I’d already hung up with snarp when that occurred to me so, followers. Thoughts?

Snarp and I also decided that: Fukawa is a lowblood, probably rust or brown, Togami is definitely a seadweller, Naegi is def candy red (or maybe lime), Hinata is probably olive, and that, while his status as an Ampora suggests seadweller, it would be funnier if Tanaka were a lowblood with fake fins glued to his face. Or maybe a brownblood with extensions on his horns who goes around claiming to be the Summoner’s descendant. Whichever.

I’m weeping tears of beef rn

This ring looks like the Sharper Image made a George Foreman grill, so it might be able to help you with those.

image

If you’ve got to wear a ring it should I guess look vaguely like a chainsaw?

image

Or maybe a winch.

image

Or a bolt?

image

Or like if you converted the girl from ICO to ring format.

image

I’m going on a quest to drop this ring in a volcano, because it’s ugly.

I’m going on a quest to drop this ring in a volcano, because it’s ugly.

(Source: ebay.com)

Men’s wedding rings are kind of fucked up.

snarp:

Why the fuck does anyone think that these are a good idea, stop it.

Rings should be made of easily-cuttable metals, so the ring can be cut off if your finger swells up because you were in an accident or went into congestive heart failure or whatever. If you put some ultra-hard shit on there because somehow that is more masculine, your finger is going to be thing that gets cut off.

Never mind, I found the Tungsten Carbide One Ring, this trend is perfect.